Some jokes heard around camp . . .
Little Harold was practicing the fiddle in the living room while his father was trying to read in the den. The family dog was lying in the den, and as the screeching sounds of little Harold's fiddle reached his ears, he began to howl loudly.
The father listened to the dog and the fiddle as long as he could. Then he jumped up, slammed his paper to the floor and yelled above the noise, "For Pete's sake, can't you play something the dog doesn't know?!"
How is lightning like a fiddle players fingers?
Neither one strikes in the same place twice
How can you tell when a fiddle player is playing out of tune?
The bow is moving.
How can you tell the difference between old-time fiddle tunes?
By their names…
What is the definition of perfect pitch?
Throwing a fiddle into a toilet without hitting the seat.
What's the difference between a fiddle and a Chain Saw?
You can turn a chain saw off.
What's the difference between a fiddler playing in "D" and a locksmith?
A locksmith knows how to change keys, and can get paid for it !
What's the difference between a fiddle and a Harley Davidson Motorcycle?
You can tune a Harley.
What's the difference between a violin and a fiddle?
A fiddle is fun to listen to.
How do you tell the difference between a violinist and a dog?
The dog knows when to stop scratching.
Did you hear about the violinist who bragged that he could play 32nd notes?
The rest of the orchestra didn't believe him, so he proved it by playing one.
"Haven't I seen your face before?" a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant. "You have, Your Honor," the man answered hopefully. "I gave your son violin lessons last winter." "Ah, yes," recalled the judge. "Twenty years!"
